“You have to stay strong and hold on to your marriage”

One day we’re treated to dinner by a couple in their 40s. Their family friends – a few other couples around the same age, are also invited. We have dinner at a restaurant and they all congratulate Y and me to our wedding. When we’re in the car with our two hosts, a married couple in their 40s, we watch them bickering. It’s nothing too serious (at least not on the surface) – the host complains that his wife always makes him come home for dinner and the wife complains that he doesn’t treat her well (whereas he replies that he has never treated anyone better than her). When we get out of the car, the host’s wife tells me:

“You have to stay strong and hold on to your marriage. You just got married, so right now everything is really great. But in 10 or 20 years’ time, things might be completely different. Remember what I just told you when that time comes.”

Have you ever gotten marriage advice from someone? I’d love to hear your stories.

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4 thoughts on ““You have to stay strong and hold on to your marriage”

  1. It seems that the people I know aren’t big on giving advice. The woman who invited you to dinner sounded like she was making an excuse for the little disagreement she and her husband had. Although staying strong and holding onto your marriage is indeed good advice. Anything as valuable as one’s marriage is worth working hard for.

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    • I guess it always depends on the marriage. I don’t think holding on to your marriage in any case is advice that is applicable to everyone. There might be reasons where it would be good to hold on to your marriage while sometimes it might be better to divorce. They do have some bigger problems than the ones mentioned above it seems, so their bickering was only the tip of the iceberg.

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  2. We got advice when first married as well. The pastor who married us had some interesting advice. Apparently couples who believe in “one true love” are less likely to make it in the long run.

    Couples who believe that they could be happy with any one of a range of people tend to have stronger relationships. He explained it as the choosing that person out of many possibles and being willing to work on the rough patches.

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